why I ride.

Next weekend, I will participate in the 20th annual Tour de Cure, a bike ride sponsored by the American Diabetes Association. I have signed up to ride the 47-mile route, which will be my longest ride yet. When I started riding a bike earlier this year, never did I think I would (or could) ride a route that long. I’ve never participated in any kind of organized sports or athletics and I’m still not sure I consider myself an “athlete, ” as that categorization seems more fitting for someone more disciplined, coordinated and, well, fit than I am.

But here I am anyway, just 8 days from riding 47 miles.

I have to admit that my palms get a little sweaty when I think about what I’m about to do.

So why do I put myself through this? There are two main reasons.

Firstly, I ride because I can. I don’t mean to sound boastful and I don’t say that in a prideful way. I ride because my body works. I have arms and legs and hands and feet that allow me to not only walk and climb stairs and dance, and that same ability to move means I can physically ride a bike. God helps me to remember that this body is one he has given to me…it’s not my own and I don’t have to look far to see people my age with bodies that don’t work as well. My health is a blessing. How could I not do something with the ability to move? I see people all of the time who have been slowed by injury, illness, age or some combination of the three. While I’m certainly not as young as I once was, I’m also not as old as I’m (hopefully) going to get. Move it or lose it.

The second reason I ride, and this ties in with the first, is that diabetes has impacted my family. My grandfather, Grandpa Charlie, was the first diabetic I knew. I didn’t understand what that meant as a kid, but whenever he was around I kept hearing about how he needed to eat every so often and he had to check his blood and give himself shots. It sounded like a complicated chore to my kid ears. As an insulin-dependent diabetic, my Grandpa had to take care of himself to keep the diabetes in check. Life changes toward the end of his life prevented him from taking the kind of care of himself that he needed to and he eventually died from complications related to diabetes.

My mother was a diabetic, and my father is also diabetic. Though neither parent needed/needs to inject insulin, the reality of parents with this disease means that if I don’t take my health seriously, the chances are high that I will end up with the same diagnosis. Though it’s entirely possible that I will die peacefully in the middle of the night of unknown causes, I have to do my best to take care of myself and for now, that means riding a bike. My diet is still not where it needs to be and I could probably use less caffeine and more sleep, but I am doing myself a solid by riding.

When I ride, I have a chance to clear my mind. I have a chance to be in my skin. My cycling has challenged me to meet, and exceed, various goals and I begin to think differently about myself because I’ve met those goals. It keeps me out of therapy. (Seriously.) It helps me to feel alive. I praise God when I ride simply because I can. I don’t take the ability to move for granted. Every mile ridden with a sore butt or a skinned knee or sweat in my eyes reminds me that the God who made me gave me this opportunity, this luxury. How could I not empty that cup?

So even though I’m a little nervous about the ride next week, I know that I will ride the entire 47 miles. I will enjoy the experience. I will ride because I can. I will ride in honor of, and in memory of, those who can’t.

Thank you to Dad, Aunt Rose, Randy and Kelley for your support!

Though I’ve met the minimum fundraising goal, there’s still time to support me in Houston’s Tour de Cure! Click here to go to my personal page!

remember me?

I’m only a little ashamed to admit that I have resorted to blogging prompts in order to write a post. I have forgotten how to blog, it seems, but I miss coming here to write. This is me trying to get back into the swing of things. I (obviously) ganked this from someone else’s blog, but I have changed some of the prompts…because now it’s on my blog, dang it. Also, I’m pretty much going to cheat on these and give several answers. You’ve been warned. :)

(Also, I should be writing a paper right now. Hey there, procrastination. How you doin’?)

Favorite time of the day: The very beginning of the day, particularly when I get up early to ride my bike. Walking the dog at 5am is like having the entire world to myself. It really is awesome.

Least favorite time of day: despite my love of sleep, I don’t love bedtime, or more specifically, my bedtime routine. When I’m ready for bed, I’m ready to get in the bed. I have to walk the dog, wash my face, make sure things are ready for the following day…on and on it goes. I need to start earlier and simplify, it would seem.

Favorite Season: All of them except summer. I have been hot since April.

Favorite Month: October. That’s when it’s reliably cool and it’s okay to break out fabulous fall clothes.

Favorite Holiday: Easter.

Favorite Subject in School: Before college, english. Since then, history.

Favorite Channel:  HGTV, any channel airing Law & Order.

Favorite Color: To wear: black and cream (not white, not beige…cream). Otherwise, pink.

Favorite Song: How much time have you got?

Favorite movie: Not much of a movie person, but Clueless and Notting Hill are favorites.

Favorite kind of music: CCM, 80s.

Favorite TV Show: This summer: Suits. Always: L & O (and all of the iterations thereof, save L.A.)

Favorite Thing to Do: Ride my bike, hang out with family/friends, complete assignments, read Ask MetaFilter.

Favorite Place in the World: So far, Colorado.

Favorite hobby: I sort of have a thing for cycling. I also watch a lot of television. (Less now that I ride a bike.)

Favorite kind of Animal: Dogs. Of course.

Favorite place to live: Texas. (But I would lurrrrve to give Chicago a whirl!)

Favorite place to vacation: Any cruise ship will do!! (the one answer that has remained unchanged from the person from whom I lifted this survey.)

Favorite Restaurant: Beck’s Prime, Café Express, Harris County Smokehouse. (I am a high-maintenance eater. I won’t lie. I haven’t always been this way, but somehow I have become one of those people who will only eat this, and never that. I try to be easy-going about it, but I’m a carbs+protein kind of girl. No frou-frou or foodie tendencies here.)

Favorite food: The humble BLT, perhaps? Oh, and queso.

Favorite thing to cook: Umm….

Favorite drink: Diet Coke! I also consume a fair amount of water, grape Gatorade (G2) and grape Powerade Zero.

Favorite chore: Vacuuming or ironing.

Favorite Make-up: Yeah, does lip gloss count? Mascara and lip gloss is how I roll. (Makeup is contraindicated when the wearer experiences hot flashes!)

(Here’s where I deleted a bunch of irrelevant ‘favorite x’ because I don’t have favorites of those things.

Favorite verse: Psalm 40:1-5, Romans 4:20-21, Psalm 13:5-6

Favorite thing to wear: Dresses, hands down. If I could manage it, I would wear one every day. Until that day comes, there’s nothing like a great pair (or two, or three) of black pants.

Favorite kind of day: After the inferno that has been this summer, any day where the temps are less than 90 degrees is perfect. I don’t mind a nice rainstorm every now and again.

Favorite memory: A handful: Tunes 2005 & 2006, lazy Saturdays with Kelley and Jennifer, family cruise 2004, the bike ride I had on Monday, August 1.

That was fun. Off to write my paper.

observations from the saddle-june 4.

Riding a road bike is a little bit like having a high-maintenance girlfriend. Before we go any farther, let me state that I don’t know anything about having a high-maintenance girlfriend. I know a little bit about being one, but that’s a different topic for a different day. I participated in a road ride today, my very first one, and I had some mechanical trouble with my bike this morning that solidified this impression. Let me explain:

  • I got up this morning and had a flat tire. I rode yesterday and cleaned my bike and aired my tires before going to bed, but this morning, I had a flat tire. The thing that caused my tire to go flat was not  a hole in the tube or anything like that…I think it was just a simple cracked valve stem cap that slowly let the air out of the tire overnight. Had I paid more attention to that yesterday, I likely could have avoided the excitement of changing a tire at 4:15 this morning. Now that it’s over, I’m glad I can change a tire. I didn’t necessarily want to do that before dawn, but we can’t always choose the timing of our lessons. On a hybrid or a mountain bike tire (equipped with different valve stems) this would have been a non-issue!
  • In addition to the weirdness with the flat tire (my rear tire), my front brakes were rubbing on one side of the rim and I couldn’t figure out why. Yesterday, everything worked fine. This morning, it was misaligned. One simple turn of a screw (a screw I hadn’t even spotted) while holding the brakes in the proper position fixed it. I wish I’d done that at mile 0 instead of mile 15, but a good lesson just the same. Getting on my bike once the breaks were working properly was like a breath of fresh air. Yes! This is why I ride! I feel like I am invincible! (Except for the hill at mile 21. Really, people? The good news is that on the other side of every incline is a descent; those are awesome.)
I didn’t have the experience  I wanted to have today with my bike ride, but it was a good experience overall. I love to ride my bike. The more I learn about how it works, the less intimidated I am by it and the more I enjoy riding it. Win-win-win.
I don’t often confess my misdeeds in this space (I mean, honestly, who has that kind of time?), but I have to share this: I rolled into a rest stop at mile 15 hot and tired and worried about my bike. This particular stop was in the parking lot of a large gas station and there were probably about 30 other riders already there. I rode in and came to a stop, but didn’t make any moves toward getting off of my bike. And I fell over. Completely over. I just forgot to put my feet down and I fell over. That was embarrassing. Whoopsies! :)

life, lately

I had to pray one of those “if this isn’t your will then take the desire from me” prayers today. This isn’t the first time I’ve prayed that, and I have the sense that as long as there’s breath in my body, it won’t be the last. Those are hard words to pray because I feel like I’m giving up and maybe it is time to give up a long and deeply held desire. I don’t even want to think about that possibility. It was a hard day from the very beginning.

———————–

Another Mother’s Day has come and gone and you know what? Having a dead mother just keeps on sucking. Over the last seven or eight days alone I can not tell you how many times I wished I had her to talk to. How is it that I still miss her so? Oh Mom, I wish you were here!

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I’m almost finished with school for the semester and I couldn’t be happier about it. I love what I’m doing, but (!) I’m so far from the end I feel like I’ll never get there. One class at a time. One class at a time. (mantra)

———————–

There are weird health issues on the horizon again. I’m not certain there’s anything to be worried about, but there’s just enough out of the ordinary to cause me considerable discomfort and to jumpstart the march toward meeting my deductible (which causes me more discomfort!). I’ll know more at the end of the week. . .or sooner if things get more serious, I suppose.

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The polite part of me wants to apologize for such a nasty, vague, poorly written post, but then I’m all, “this blog is called ‘lifewithheather’ is it not?” So, yeah.

let me reintroduce myself.

Hi! My name is Heather and this is my blog. I didn’t intend to stay away for such a long time, but you know how it is, right? One thing leads to another and suddenly it’s been ten days (or more!) since your last blog post. Whoopsies!

I wanted to quickly share some things I have learned about myself and cycling since I’ve taken up bike riding. I still love it. I’ve ridden a little more than 120 miles since March 27. I’m going hunting for a road bike next week and I couldn’t be more stoked about that. Okay, it’s late, so here are some observations from the saddle:

  • I have a serious competitive streak. . .with my own records. (Narcissism?) While riding today, I bested a pace I set yesterday and almost did myself in in the process. I must remind myself that I don’t have to ride all of the miles at once! I just can’t help it.
  • I do a lot more laundry than I did before. A lot. Cycling clothes are expensive!
  • I have my first cycling farmer tan. I’m oddly proud of it.
  • The lycra bike shorts really do serve a purpose while you’re riding. At the grocery store? Not so much.
  • I like being a part of the cycling community, even though it’s from a great distance at this point and I feel a lot like an impostor. I’m learning so much about how to ride smart rides and maybe one day I’ll even enter a race.
  • Speaking of rides/races, I think I’m going to enter a race that’s happening in June! Eek! I’m planning to do the 30 mile route (the other choices are 16, 50 and 100). Thirty is definitely the best choice.
  • My butt (mostly) doesn’t hurt anymore. That’s a HUGE cause for celebration. Huge, people.
  • I made a spreadsheet with all of my times/distances/paces. I know, OOC. But, numbers!
  • Definitely feeling less anxious overall and I think the cycling has a lot to do with it. It’s a beautiful, unexpected result.
  • I’m out of bullet points.

Kelley’s coming tomorrow!!!!!! Yee-haw! It’s going to be a full, busy weekend. Yay! I might need a day off to recover though. I’m just saying. :)

bicycle!

Okay, so perhaps it was a bit too early to sound the bugle at my return to blogging? I want to write, I’m just feeling a little performance anxiety when I have time to sit down and write. Although I don’t fully understand being suddenly gunshy about writing on my own blog, after more than 1K posts on various blogs over the years, gunshy is what I am nonetheless. Weird.

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Since I’ve been away, I have found a new hobby and I couldn’t be more hooked! I have started to ride a bicycle and it’s pretty awesome. I’ve mentioned before that my boss rides and he’s been super helpful about helping me to understand what I might be looking for in a bike and how to best find a bike that’ll meet my (as yet undetermined) needs. I’m actually riding a bike I borrowed from him and I. love. it. I picked it up last Saturday and I’ve ridden just over fifty miles since then.

Yes, fifty miles.

I know that one day, I’ll look back on this post, boasting about completing such low mileage over the span of seven rides, but for now, I’m luxuriating in the sensation of moving my limbs, raising my heart rate and breathing fresh air, now matter how far it takes me. It helps me to clear my head, you know?

That’s a good thing.

Bicycle, by Queen
–Song of the Day

great is your faithfulness.

I remember my affliction and my wandering, the bitterness and the gall. I remember them and my soul is downcast within me. Yet this I call to mind and therefore I have hope:

Because of the Lord’s great love, we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. I say to myself, “The Lord is my portion; therefore I will wait for him.”

The Lord is good to those whose hope is in him, to the one who seeks him; it is good to wait quietly for the salvation of the Lord.

–Lamentations 3:19-26

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I’m back! Thanks for reading!

 

pc load letter!

So. . .I bought a new printer. It’s a great little (except not little at all) machine that should serve me until I finish my current degree program (December 2013). It prints quickly and wirelessly and without a lot of smack talk or fuss, as my old printer was wont to do, so we are getting along swimmingly so far. Hopes are high.

If anyone would like a gently used Lexmark X4850, I know of one that’s available. For free! As long as you don’t actually want to print with it, it should be just fine. As luck would have it, one ink cartridge is almost completely full and the second one has a new-in-the-packaging replacement at the ready. Of course. (Why couldn’t the dang thing die when it had mostly empty ink cartridges? Rude.)

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My mind is very unquiet these days and I’m not feeling so good about that. I am struggling with doubts about my ability to do this thing I’ve set out to do (not this class, per se, but the entire degree. This is a problem. A big one.) This is exactly the wrong battle to be fighting the last two weeks of a course. I’m kinda freaking out about all that I have to do before this class is over and my confidence is completely in the crapper. If you are inclined to pray for me, if you would pray about that specifically, that would be great.

—————

This battle is not against flesh and blood.

a most inconvenient failing

My printer has died. I’m in the middle of research paper writing season and this is particularly inconvenient. I am a little paralyzed the replacement choices (and the time with which I have to decide). It would be fantastic if the perfect replacement machine would magically appear on my doorstep. I don’t mind paying for it, I just don’t have time to go and find it.

I suppose I’ll make the time, now won’t I? :)

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I’m happy to say that it’s been a long time since I’ve been heartbroken. In a word, being heartbroken stinks. I recently rediscovered this song and it does a great job of describing the nasty surprise of being on the wrong side of tender feelings, especially when you thought things were good.

Chorus:
What am I supposed to do when the best part of me was always you?
What am I supposed to say when I’m all choked up and you’re okay?
I’m falling to pieces, I’m falling to pieces.
———————–
‘Cause when a heart breaks, no it don’t break even.

“Breakeven,” The Script, Song of the Day.

I’m feeling a little melancholy and this song just kind of fits.

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